Welcome! Kick off your shoes, get comfy and join in as we chat about books, romance and the ups and downs of everyday life.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Today's Special - - Lois Greiman

Lois Greiman is in the house!  This successful author of more than 22 published novels has a very interesting background.  Born on a cattle ranch in North Dakota, Lois now lives on a small farm in Minnesota with, according to her website, "three children, fifteen horses and a menagerie of pets."  Between North Dakota and Minnesota, she worked as a high fashion model, a fitness instructor, a veterinary assistant and she also professionally trained and showed Arabian horses.  Honestly, I'm not sure where she finds the time to write! Please give her a warm welcome!







Romance novels…I love 'em. But, after writing a couple dozen of them, I finally decided I wanted to try something a little different. Hence, Unzipped, the first book in my Chrissy McMullen series was released from Bantam Books about five years ago. And even though it was a new avenue for me, I found that I really didn't venture too far from my usual haunts. There's still a strong relationship running through the series. There's still flirting and double entendres and that love/hate chemistry that makes me keep coming back for more. But my favorite thing about romance is the pick up lines. I lovvvve me a corny pickup line. So, in honor of romance novels, love/hate chemistry, and mystery novels that reallllly kind of want to be romance novels, here are a few of my favorites:

What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.

Hi. I have big feet.

Roses are red, candlelight flickers, after the meal, it's off with the knickers.

If a fat man puts you in a bag tonight, don't worry, I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas.

Would you help me find my lost puppy? I think he went into that cheap hotel room across the street.

Your eyes are as blue as my toilet water at home.

I'm not actually this tall. I'm sitting on my wallet.

Are you a parking ticket? Cuz you got 'fine' written all over you.










Not that my male protagonist, Lieutenant Jack Rivera, would ever use any of those corny lines. But Chrissy McMullen…all bets are off where she's concerned. After writing seven of her novels, I'm still surprised at what she'll say or how many new ways she'll think up to torment the good lieutenant.

To celebrate the release of Uncorked, the seventh Chrissy novel, I'm giving away an Amazon gift card to one much appreciated commenter. So…what's your favorite pick up line?




36 comments:

  1. Hi PJ and Lois I remember one really horrible pick-up line:
    "If I said I like your body, would you hold it against me?"

    Now with very little change it's a huge hit song for Britney Spears: "If I said I want your body now. Would you hold it against me?'

    Truly LOL! Plus ca change, plus c'est la meme chose! N'est Pas?

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  2. It's a cheesy pick up line, but very funny. "Baby, I'm an American Express lover..you shouldn't go home without me."

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    1. LOL! I hadn't heard that one before!

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  3. "Heaven must be missing an Angel."

    Who falls for these?

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    1. Some people I know would fall head over heels for that one, Marybelle.

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  4. I had to look this one up:

    Ua hānau ʻia ʻoe ma ka mokuhali lewa lipo? … No ke aha maila? No ka mea, aia ʻoe ma waho o ka honua!
    Were you born on a space shuttle? … Why? ‘Cause you’re outta this world!

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    1. ::Snicker:: Thanks for including the Hawaiian translation, Kim!

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  5. Wow!! Those are all wonderful! But fsbuchler, my French is ummmm poor at best. Can you translate?

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    1. Not sure if fsbuchler will check back in but I think it translates to "The more things change, the more they stay the same." Flora, did I get that right?

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  6. Hi Lois! Great to have you with us today. Here's one I hadn't heard before:

    "Don’t let me be the one that got away!"

    Love it! :)

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  7. Great pick-up lines. Here are a few more.
    "Hey is that a mirror in your pants? Cause I can see me in your pants." "Do you have a quarter. Because I have to call my mom and tell her that I met the woman of my dreams." "I'm new in town, can you give me directions to your apartment." Those are some of my favorites that I have heard over the years.
    Thanks for the giveaway. The book sounds great and would love to read.
    christinebails@yahoo.com

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  8. Thanks Chris.

    I like "Is it love at first sight or do I have to walk by again."

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    1. ROFL! I actually know people I can visualize saying this.

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  9. I haven't heard a lot of those. I can't believe people would actually say somehting like that. Here is another one: "I’m no Fred Flintstone, but I sure could make your bed rock."

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  10. i just could remember the great pick-up lines : "selalu lah berbuat kebaikan, karena apa yang kamu tanam itulah yang kamu tuai = always doing good thing, because what you plant is what you reap"

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  11. This is certainly NOT my favorite, but my most memorable. I was fresh out of a 14 yr marriage to my high school sweetheart and I was "out on the town" with a divorcee friend of mine (for the first time!). A fairly good looking man walked up to me and said:
    "Hi, wanna f**k?" True story. I left shortly after that...alone.... left my friend and all!! LOL

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  12. Oh wow - are these lines something or what? LOL - mine is nothing by comparison - "I'll bet the guys are just beating a path to your door." PS - they weren't - and aren't - more LOL

    Felicia
    mrschopchop@verizon.net

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  13. "If I had a dollar every time I tried to pick up a chick, I'd still be poor" - surprisingly, this one actually works!
    "I'd take you to McDonald's but I am already super-sized"
    "You have 206 bones in your body, would you like another?"
    And for the girls...
    "Am I cute enough yet or can I buy you another beer?"

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  14. Betty Hamiliton, my apologies to you from the world at large. Some guys shouldn't be allowed to speak... Still, it is a little funny. :)

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  15. You look like a model. Wanna dance. Let's go.

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  16. Lois—You had some good ones. Here's one more:

    If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.

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  17. Please step away from the bar, cuz your melting all the ice!

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  18. Didn't you win a beauty pageant recently?

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  19. I like the melting the ice one. Sounds desperate but clever. :)

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  20. From Beerfest, which my son loves, is: "I'm just lookin' for a little slap and pickle!"

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  21. One of my favorite and cheesy (food pun intended) is: What's cooking good-looking?
    Now if a man can cook he may get away with that line!

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    1. Also, he doesn't have to be a master chef but he does get BROWNIE points for trying.

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  22. Hey Lois! Welcome to The Romance Dish. I was laughing while reading your one liners. Too funny!!

    Gosh it has been so long since I have heard a pick up line! The hubby and I have been married for almost 22 years and have been together for 25 years ...

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  23. Here's a few more cheesy ones:
    You're so beautiful that you made me forget my pickup line.
    Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!
    There is something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn't have your number in it.

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  24. Haven't heard the slap and pickle one. Sounds like something Renaissance Fest goers would love.

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  25. Was your father a thief? 'Cause someone stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.

    bn100candg(at)hotmail(dot)com

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  26. Thanks for the great post!

    Sorry, but you owe me a drink. [Why?] Because when I looked at you, I dropped mine.

    Your legs must be tired because you've been running through my mind all night (I've actually heard that one being used)

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  27. I certainly didn't miss much by not spending much time on the dating scene. I hung out with friends and didn't spend much time i n bars or at parties. That plus I've been marries for almost 40 years, so What I did hear is long lost. I can't believe some people would seriously use these. As a joke maybe. They were fun to read.

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  28. I was going to say, "Heeeyyyy, how YOU doin'?" but I like the one erin posted - Sorry, but you owe me a drink. [Why?] Because when I looked at you, I dropped mine.

    I also like these from Barbara E - You're so beautiful that you made me forget my pickup line.
    There is something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn't have your number in it.

    Love your post!

    robindpdx(at)yahoo(dot)com

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  29. I think the best pick up line I ever heard was:

    "Has anyone ever told you that you are finer than a frog's hair split three ways?"

    As pick up lines go it isn't very flattering but I can say it made me laugh and I ended up talking to the guy who used it on me. Anyone that original to come up with a line like that and then brave enough to use it in a bar deserved at least a little chit chat, lol :)

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